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Category Archives: Nigella Lawson

making plans for nigel

21 Oct

I admit to not being the biggest Nigel Slater fan.  I will certainly look at his tasty recipes in the Guardian or Observer but have avoided his writing and previous television programmes.  It’s the Nigel/Nigella problem; flowery, over-the-top language that I try to steer clear of.  Just tell me what ingredients to buy and how to make it taste bloody nice.  That’s all I need.  I am a simple creature.  Do I really need to know that the bananas displayed in your huge kitchen/diner are ambrosial or the folding in of the lavender scented sugar takes you back to a time you fell asleep in your nanna’s airing cupboard?  I am certainly not a fan of Gordon’s method: “ADD CHEESE.  MIX.  WHACK IT IN THE OVEN. DONE!” … just somewhere in between would be perfect.  In my head, this means Jamie Oliver (without the ‘bruv’s or ‘pucker’s, innit?) but I know many who disagree.

I have warmed to Nigel with his recent programmes that focus on different themes (citrus or classic comfort food for example) or give advice on what main meal to cook on day one and magically use the leftovers for days two to five.  A homely Sunday roast chicken can go a long way!  This particular episode dealt with the topic of abundance.  A glut, if you will.  Mmmmmm, glut. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on October 21, 2012 in BBC, Jamie Oliver, Nigel Slater, Nigella Lawson

 

NIGELI$$IMA

08 Oct

Image

After reading John Crace’s glorious kickabout this morning, I was keen to watch another episode of this hugely successful, slightly bizarre ‘Italianate’ show. But not much had changed. This isn’t cooking. This is advertorial.

‘Her’ kitchen (at least they aren’t pretending) is grand beyond the imaginings of emperors, but even that’s nothing special these days, so the producers have decided to shoot almost the entire show at the magic hour; with sunlight (actually mega-lights, probs) streaming in and making a series shot in Bristol look a bit more Tuscan-porny.

After that, things get a bit confusing. The music shunts between daytime TV jazz, Meters funk, 40s Dixie and folky tinkling. The banter shifts between the phone-sex innuendo satirised years ago by Ronni Ancona and slightly forced gags and filler-guff about markets. “Sooooo easy, it makes itself…” well yeah, apart from the bit where you have to individually shell each broad bean by hand. The pitch of the cooking veers between oh-really-you-must-it’s-so-authentic and sod-it-do-whatever-you-like…like-me! She breezes things like: “Polenta, which we’re all familiar with…” – but many other bog-standard Italian ingredients are gushingly explained to the proles. Even the cameraman can’t choose between the lens smeared with Vaseline and the one that isn’t, so he just mixes and matches as he sees fit. At least she’s not claiming it’s ‘real’ Italian. The food? Oh, whatever. It’s all good easy fun.

So many things they can’t seem to decide on, but one thing that stays rock-like is Nigella-as-brand. She’s flogging herself and her heaving bits and her effortlessness and her bussed-in, gruesomely smug ‘lifestyle’ friends as well as ever, and Christmas is coming, and there’s a bit of the gleam for sale. It’s just entertainment, I know, but she doesn’t seem quite as joyful or silly or self-aware as previous series. There’s a slightly workaday feel to the golden glow. Back to business.

 
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Posted by on October 8, 2012 in BBC, British, Italian, Nigella Lawson, Recipe Kitchen Based Genre

 

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KHOO 2

27 Mar

Rachel, Rachel, Rachel, with your glossy lippy and your saturated Hipstamatic kitchen and your cheery everywoman accent and your multiple costume changes (where is that woman’s storage?) and your Global knives and your crowd-pleasing K-Tel cookery classics and and and. Who wouldn’t fall for your carefully stage managed Nigella’s-hot-baby-sisterish charms?

The second episode gives us more of the same: Parisporn, that hoary standby “cheery banter with market traders”, more nice-and-easy looking recipes (I must do fish in paper more often), flylady Fifties action, piping bags (she doesn’t ‘choux till it pops’ though), vintage enamel, and a whole raft of c’est touts and et voilas (does she actually speak any more French than I do?). And why does she have her salt in an annoying, finger-inaccessible jamjar though? That would drive me insane. Her beef bourguignion was waaay too liquid for me, but the salted caramel puds were genius though, an fairly easy hit as long as you know your oven pretty well.

The boulangeries of Paris are as fucking amazing as they are pictured, by the way. I once got up on three hours sleep to go to Gosselin in Les Halles purely because Jeffrey Steingarten recommended it in passing as selling one of the best baguettes in Paris, but that’s because I’m a tragic food-addled knob. I spent a fortune and ran for the Eurostar looking like some kind of mobile bakery. Good times.

 
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Posted by on March 27, 2012 in Baking, BBC, British, French, Nigella Lawson, Pastry, Rachel Khoo, Recipe Kitchen Based Genre

 

a maid in the living room, chef in the kitchen …

18 Mar

Having just watched David Rocco’s Dolce Vita, it made me consider what the average viewer wants from their presenter.

David is Canadian Italian and a handsome chap, in that eye-twinkling-I know-I-am kinda way.  What with him and that cheeky Danny Boome, it’s just not right.

As a 30-something female, I’m used to having a procession of attractive women give advice on how how to entertain friends, bake the perfect cake or create the ideal Sunday roast – all with a wink and a licking of the lips.  I’m no longer a 25 year old threatened by Nigella’s heaving bosom or embarrassed by Dervla Kirwan’s M&S voice over.  I pretty much expect a knowing look to camera as a sausage is suggestively eaten and find this amusing.  I’ve never met Nigella but I bet she’s a bloody good laugh and knows what she’s doing and it’s all done in jest (I have, however, seen her briefly at a book event and can confirm her ridiculous beauty).

Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on March 18, 2012 in European, Fabulous Baker Brothers, Good Food Channel, Hairy Bikers, Lorraine Pascale, Nigella Lawson, Raymond Blanc, Rick Stein

 

patronising, moi?

11 Mar

I imagine when creating a cookery programme the producer, director and the talent themselves discuss or, at least, think about the overall tone of the show.  Do they aim their programme at novices or those who entertain regularly for their family/friends?  Should all the ingredients be available cheaply from a high street supermarket or is it OK for the wallet-busting wild garlic or truffle oil to be purchased at Borough Market?

We all know what happens when one assumes and overall I think people get it right for their audience - you know what you’re getting with Nigella Lawson or Delia Smith.  Expensive or decedant things can be made at home for a treat now and again. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on March 11, 2012 in Delia Smith, Gordon Ramsay, Heston Blumenthal, Meat, Nigella Lawson, Ordinary Cooks

 

friends with benefits

07 Mar

I often ask myself ‘why am I not friends with a chef off the telly?’

I am certainly friends with people who love to entertain, people who make a mean cocktail and people who do wonders with smoking and pulling stuff but, sorry, you’re no good to me until you’ve got your own show.  The ultimate experience would go something like this:
J: “Alright Fanny, it’s Jamie!  What you up to next week, bruv?  I’m doing my new show on Spanish food and need some of me mates to pop over and stuff their faces with my loverly grub.  You up for it?”
F: “Well, I suppose.  I was planning to clean out the cat litter, arrange my CD collection … yeah, why not?  Do I have to look hip?”

Many a time has my attention wandered as Nigella glides through her house with plates of food for a group of random people.  Are they neighbours being thanked for the inconvience of the film crew traipsing around?  Are they friends who are happy to appear on television looking like poshos?  Or are they actors?  Maybe, in the case of Maria McErlane, they’re all three!  I see Maria round Nigella’s ALL THE TIME.  How often does she return the favour do you think?

I’ve also spotted a familiar face or two round Jamie’s, playing with the kids or being manly with a barbeque.  Maybe Nigel doesn’t have any famous friends.  Or any friends.

Oh, go on then Nige – I’LL BE YOUR FRIEND  :)

 

 
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Posted by on March 7, 2012 in Jamie Oliver, Nigel Slater, Nigella Lawson

 

a little taster

01 Mar

The most annoying thing in any programme is the tasting. If Jamie Oliver spends five hours making a chilli I doubt he’s going to taste it and say “meh”. Nigella will tell you what you already know – her salted caramel hot chocolate is better than sex, or something. I don’t need to see these cooks or chefs frown in orgasmic wonder at how darned good it is.

In Fanny Towers, appreciation is shown with the occasional “MMMMMMM!” followed by a high five.  That’ll do me.

 
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Posted by on March 1, 2012 in Jamie Oliver, Nigella Lawson

 

shouting larder, larder, larder

23 Feb

Anyone familiar with cookery shows will know the phrase “a quick meal made with everyday ingredients from your larder”.  Yeah, right.

Whilst watching Everyday Gourmet I heard this phrase and my groans were cut short by Justine’s mention of tinned tuna.  Yes, a tin of tuna.  I have one of those, I thought.  In my larder.  Bloody hell!  Justine went on to make fish croquettes with wasabi mayo.  I don’t have any wasabi, but you can’t win them all.

This made me think about my own attitude to what constitutes an ‘everyday’ ingredient and my initial snobbishness about using tinned fish.  Justine aims her programme at families, people on a budget or those short on time.  A seemingly far cry from Nigella’s luxurious pantry, the size of a small shed.

Ingredients will no doubt differ depending on: status (single, family, shared accommodation), location (city or rural), what you can afford etc. 

Masterchef Australia has a challenge that involves cooking a fine dining meal using everyday items from an everyday family’s cupboard.  No cinnamon infused sugar a la Nigella or a canister of liquid nitrogen that Heston surely keeps at home.  Frozen food, tinned fruits, biscuits and cereal were their ingredients.  Some successful results but many failures.

So, I wonder, what is the most random item in your larder and what is the most ridiculous thing declared an everyday ingredient by a TV chef?

 

 
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Posted by on February 23, 2012 in Australian, Masterchef Australia, Nigella Lawson

 
 
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